Thursday, December 15, 2005

Office Party

Most people hate office Christmas parties. I did too. Until tonight.

The booze was a-flowin'. I have been here only 2 months, so everyone wanted to meet the new girl. I was at this party for less than 2 hours and I found people were volunteering information to me about themselves as we chatted quietly over hors d'ouvres. Here's the sum of what I now know about my coworkers (using pseudonyms of course):

#1. "Dinah" can really hold her liquor and once drunk her supervisor under the table and then got fired.

#2. "Betty" in another department had a nervous breakdown at work and went catatonic until the ambulance came.

#3. "Gwen" is married but NOT to the man she is living with. He is married too, but not to her.

#4. "Mandy's" teenage son made a lot of money trafficing marijuana. Apparently it was just a "phase".

#5. "Jill" has some scandalous theories about how/why "Gertrude" had broken her wrist 3x in 6 months.

#6. "Lynne" likes my boss. A lot.

#7. "Maureen" hopes her ex-husband dies before she retires so that she won't have to share her pension 50/50. She also encourages him to smoke more.

#8. Everyone thinks I am wide-eyed and innocent enough to be harmless with their deep dark secrets. They also thought I would remember nothing because I was drinking too. (I was not.)

'Tis the season to be jolly, fa la la la la, la la, la la.

7 Comments:

At 11:50 PM , Blogger Kimberly said...

Franny, the blackmail queen!!!!

told you, your kids will learn ALOT from you...well maybe just Natty as she is the brains, right?!?!

 
At 12:31 AM , Blogger Magdalena said...

Gosh, this really makes me re-think all of the things that I have divulged to you! Thank goodness you are on my side! And I would just like to say that I would prefer to remain on your side oh "Queen of deep dark secrets" ;)

Miss you!

 
At 9:22 AM , Blogger Mark Leslie said...

I fondly remember the days when I saw you as wide-eyed, innocent and harmless.

Man, was I ever the naive one . . .

 
At 10:22 AM , Blogger Pete Mitchell said...

Oh wow! And Mark doesn't even know the stuff we've got on HIM!

So Franny and Kim, whaddaya think? Is this the year Mark buys us all Ferrarri's for Christmas?

 
At 11:52 AM , Blogger Kimberly said...

hmmm, I think I'd like a jeep instead...in black or blue, I'm not picky!

 
At 4:13 PM , Blogger MacManus said...

Hey...um....Franny....you know that email I sent you? You know I was kidding right!?

 
At 7:55 PM , Blogger Franny said...

I think people have always opened up to me with their secrets because I am kinda like the "Counselor Troi" at work and in my social circle. (Wish I had that green dress with the assymetrical neckline - you know the one!) I relate a lot in life to Star Trek TNG. Yes I am a nerd.

And to those of you who are concerned, I don't kiss and tell.

Well, usually I don't.

 

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