Sunday, December 18, 2005

Blue Light Special

My neighbor has those neon blue Christmas lights that x-ray your soul and probably give you a brain tumor. You know the ones I am talking about. I still see them burned onto my corneas when I close my eyes.


This week my hubby and I will be doing our yearly charity stint as Santa and Mrs. Claus. I am a little concerned about the quality of this year's "performance" though. First of all, I haven't played any songs without swears and/or suggestive content in 363 days, and if I don't get my act together, we might end up with this:

"Ok kids, time to rock with Rudolph the Fucking Angry Anti-Establishment Reindeer featuring a little help from my friends Greeeeeeeen Dayyyyyyy!!!"

Secondly, Santa (my hubby) might not be what the children expected either. He mentioned to me today that this was the worst year for him ever and he couldn't wait for it to end. He's been downtrodden, run down, unjustly persecuted and overworked, leaving him more than a little depressed these days. I worry that the "jolly old man" may come across a little "off":

"Ho ho ho kids. Look, it's time ya'll grow up so let me tell you a bit about life - they hit ya when you're down, then they hit ya again. The corporations suck your blood. We're all gonna die. And I'm not really Santa. There is no SANTA!"

See? Not a good show.

Luckily there's something about his red velvet suit and my red velvet dress (with the faux fur!)that changes who you are and how you feel. In that minute it takes to dress, you are transformed, and become whoever you want to be. And there's nothing more appealing to two bi-polar manically depressed people in love than that.


At 9:00 AM , Blogger Pete Mitchell said...


Yup; I'm with you guys. As far as crap years go, this ranks way-a-a-a-a-ay up there. Thirteen freakin' days to go (ot that I've been counting down since August or anything.)

Laughed till I cried at Cat's Santa comment. I'll be standing in the back row cheering.

So...uhhh...where ya doin' the Santa thing?

At 10:16 AM , Blogger Dancing Jelly Bean said...

Hey, Thanks so much for the comment. Whenever I get them from other people they are always advertisments.... Annoying. And I have been counting down till the end of exams since November. Hahaha. Can't wait to go home. Oh well. I hope I do well!! Have fun dressing up as Mrs. Clause!!! Peace

At 3:16 PM , Blogger Kimberly said...

it's awfully nice for you and Cat to do this charity stint, even if you aren't in the mood. I think your takes on the Claus couple will be VERY educational for the little ones.

chin up hon, like Pete says only 13 days to go!

At 7:21 PM , Blogger MacManus said...

I'm sure Cat seeing you in your red velvet may improve his mood, if nothing else a little ;) Its nearly all over so hang in there kid


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