Thursday, March 09, 2006

The Poetry Infiltration

Ok, brace yourselves...I went to a poetry reading last night! Now some of you may be confused/concerned about this, so I've assembled a list of frequently asked questions, for your convenience.

Poetry Reading FAQs:

So Franny, now that you've gone to a poetry reading, does this mean that you are better than me?
No, this does not mean that I am better than you (not ALL of you anyways). If I wasn't already better than you, then chances are I'm still not.

Are you gonna be saying things like "herself" and "thou" from now on?
No, this does not mean I will now be speaking about myself in the 3rd person. And no, this doesn't mean that everything I say will be written in metaphor. Conversational english and "slang" will still apply to my blog. (see next answer)

Can we expect a rhyming blog in the near future?
No. And fuck off.

Are people who read at poetry readings "normal'?
No. All of them are weird and dangerous in one way or another, and when they seem normal, that's when you should really be worried. Except for my awesome poetic writer friend Mark Leslie. He's the most normal of the bunch...

What do poets eat?
Puppies. Though some are vegan.

I once went to a poetry reading in the 60's and they were snapping and wearing funny hats called berets. Is that what it was like?
Sounds like you went to a boring poetry reading. The only hats I saw were the tiny little tin-foil ones on the genitals of the strippers.

Can you hook me up with a hot, young poet?
Sure, I know just the girl for you. She was wearing red and blames the patriarchy for the rape and pillage of the she-goddess, "mother earth".

Do you have any advice for aspiring poets like myself?
Yes. Take off all of your clothes at work, stride into your boss' office, and tell him/her you're a poet and you know it.
And don't forget the hat.


At 8:24 PM , Blogger Kimberly said...


you forgot to mention the performance artist that you insist was not all he seemed to be!

Thanks for coming out last night. Next time we'll do something funner! :P

At 2:19 AM , Blogger Motherkitty said...

You are just plain funny.

Actually the poets who snapped and wore berets were Beats back in the 1950s. I knew a few in New York back in the old days. The only kind of rhymes they composed and/or read were too weird for me to understand. It's like listening to modern jazz -- either you get it or you don't.

I have to admire anyone who would consciously go to a poetry reading, though, and really enjoy it.

At 9:44 AM , Blogger Motherkitty said...

Frannie, if you were mine, I would gather you up with open arms and give you a big hug. You are not only a warm, open, funny person, but you are also intelligent, kind, and sweet.

Thank you for your beautiful comment. All I have to say is how very proud I am to know you. Good job being a good person, a good mother, a good wife, and a good soul.

At 12:13 PM , Blogger bornfool said...

Well, I think you've answered all of my questions...:)

At 3:06 PM , Blogger Abandoned in Pasadena said...

Did you really go to a poetry reading? I can only relate those to the Beatnicks of the 60's...really weird & nerdy. chuckle,chuckle.

Although in college they made us go to poetry readings, operas, ballets, plays, speeches by Nelson Mandella, Alex Haley & lots was MANDATORY...and we received credit for it. They were trying to culturize us.

At 6:59 PM , Blogger somershade said...

I say you gotta try everything atleast once.
Funny post and thanks for the comment,you cheered me up. I'm going to post a picture just for you, check it out.

At 11:01 AM , Blogger Abandoned in Pasadena said...

If you want to see a moose...go to Montana and Wyoming. That's where I always see them on our travels.

At 1:54 AM , Blogger Alipurr said...

just wanted to say, love the tulips

At 8:15 AM , Blogger Mark Leslie said...

Damn, I knew I forgot my beret at home that night. Thanks for not mentioning it and embarassing me before I had to take the stage, Franny.


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