The Special Ones, God Made Twice

Dear Natalie & Nicky,

Happy Birthday babies. Well, not babies anymore, I guess. I can't believe it's been two years already. I know you can't read yet, but I'm sure it won't be long before you'll be reading my blog to all your friends as evidence that your mother is truly insane. But until then, thanks for putting up with me as I fumble through the neverending "twin conundrum". I really think I need just one more arm...

But actually, it hasn't been that bad. Both of you are patient souls. For there has never been a "just me" with you two. It's always been "just us". Though I admit that most of the first 2 years are a blur. I barely remember (or have suppressed) the round-the-clock feedings, the bouncy-bouncy with a newborn in each arm, the tagteam crying and the tandem puking. My right arm has grown muscular from the whole "a spoonful for you and a spoonful for you" routine. Not to mention the millions of dollars we've spent on formula, diapers and laundry detergent. When the two of you grow up to be World Champion Pairs figureskaters, you'll share the wealth I'm sure.

It was a lifetime ago that we feared for our little girl's life before she was even born. How many days we spent panicked that we would lose you. It was a tough Christmas that year, full of uncertainty and danger. And then when you came out bright red and yelling your block off, we knew you would be ok. Funny how you still make sure your presence is heard everywhere you go, up until this day. You are a truly a force to be reckoned with.

And Nicky, ever the quiet, steady one. We jokingly called you "Nicky the Snitch" even before you were born, because we had a feeling you would be pure goodness and a bane to troublemakers everywhere! You've won the hearts of so many with your simple needs and your quiet nature. And that laugh! I can't say enough about your beautiful, hopscotch, effervescent laugh.

It's sad that I didn't get to spend much time with you two at your little party tonight. Everyone wanted to hold the guests of honour, and I was so busy entertaining. So, after you both fell asleep, I crept into your rooms and kissed your foreheads and whispered happy birthday to each of you. You don't know that I did it, but it made me feel so much better.

Anyhow, it's late and mommy's tired. There's something I really need to tell you before I signout though: I'm sorry if I screwed up a bit in the beginning, but I think I was more than a little overwhelmed, having two newborns and a toddler to deal with. If one day you come to realize that your mom is only human, perhaps you'll take comfort in the knowledge that no one on this earth will ever love you as much as I do.

Happy Birthday babies.

Love, Mommy